Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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