Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize