everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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