so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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