shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
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