Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize