Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
