We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.