who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Randomize
