well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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