I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
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I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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