zippers are such a cool invention
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
