You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Randomize