You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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