I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize