never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
