And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Randomize