Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
