Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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