when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
