I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
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