Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...

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(847): View more from Illinois

Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.

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(573): View more from Missouri

I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"

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(630): View more from Illinois

life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(303): View more from Colorado

theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.

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(850): View more from Florida

You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.

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(416): View more from Toronto

arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?

(647): View more from Ontario

Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo

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