This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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