oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize