pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Randomize