he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
