His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
