Plan B is the new Plan A
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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