would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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