She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
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