I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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