i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
