North Korea, Best Korea!
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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