I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
