even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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