i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
