she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I said "one day" and that day is not today
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
