I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
