Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
