So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
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Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
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You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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