yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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