do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
