We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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