So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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