i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
