she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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