Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize