I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
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after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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