and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
