wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
i think i just lost a toe
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
