Are we in a gay sports bar?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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