she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
